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1 January 2011
ANNUAL NEW YEAR’S DAY ANTI-FOOTBALL RUN

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CA Mille 2011
April 24-28

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Lemons, Concours & Toyota

In 1923, the French town of Le Mans staged a 24-hour auto race on a country road network nearby.  The 24 Hours of Le Mans soon became a world-renowned annual race, valued by motor manufacturers for the publicity value of a victory there.  Bentley made their reputation with several wins in the late 1920s.  Ferrari and Porsche did the same in the ‘50s and ‘60s.  In recent years, Audi has been the star.

Bay Area motoring journalist and irreverent car buff Jay Lamm has been fascinated with ideas for the productive use of cheap cars.  His “noodling” led to the idea for a 24 Hours of Lemons.  In 2007, at the tatty, and now defunct Altamont Speedway near Livermore, the first “Lemons” was held.  Nearly 100 entrants had found cars they could buy for $500 or less (a requirement), then added required safety equipment and appeared on the starting line.  Some teams decorated their cars, and often themselves, with a wacky theme.  Race organizers invented a series of off-the-wall penalties for bad race conduct:

Al Gore Memorial Carbon-Neutral Penalty: You have to plant a tree while the crowd throws tofu at you.

Marcel Marceau: Must don white face paint, French sailor’s shirt and a beret and “mime your crime,” without words, to describe your infraction and how you’ll avoid a repeat.

Three-Legged Race:  If two drivers collide, they are called in, legs taped together, and must walk to concession stand and buy organizer a hot dog.

They also solicited votes for “People’s Curse,” the most disliked entry, which would then be crushed about halfway through the race.  Participants loved it, the automotive press publicized it, and additional events were scheduled nationwide.  At first, some of the better racetracks thought Lemons was beneath them, but now with 21 events scheduled this year, and no lack of enthusiastic participants, even Sonoma’s Sears Point Infineon Raceway has welcomed the 24 Hours of Lemons.  Amazingly, the French Automobile Club de l’Ouest, organizers of the genuine 24 Hours of Le Mans, have never been heard from.

Recently, 151 cars descended on Sears Point with their junkers.  They don’t run around the clock, but take a break during the nighttime hours.  Still, over two days, they race for about 15 hours.  Cars break-down, but the young enthusiasts are extremely resourceful in implementing cheap, imaginative repairs to keep the old crocks going.  In an odd way, the existence of this race is testimony to how well the cars made today are.  Most $500 cars are 15-25 years old, probably having near 200,000 miles or so, yet there’s enough life in them to survive one or more Lemons races.

Marin-Sonoma Concours d’Elegance

At the other end of the social scale, this event, on the national scene in only its second year, will be held at the Marin Civic Center on May 16th.  A unique feature of this show is that it honors three forms of motorization:  land, sea and air.  In addition to the cars, there will be some classic wooden boats in the Center’s lagoon.  And antique planes from Schellville and South Ranch Airport, will fly overhead.

Intended Deceit

In 1986, television’s 60 Minutes trashed Audi with accusations of “unintended acceleration.”  Audi trustingly let two of their engineers be interviewed.  When those professionals stated that their cars couldn’t do what was alleged, and stated that drivers were stepping on the wrong pedal, they were laughed at.  60 Minutes used a fake video to show an out-of-control Audi.  Other media picked up the sensational story.  Locally, public garages refused to park your Audi because unidentified mysterious forces might make it uncontrollable.  Audi sales plummeted.  Investigations continued.  Finally, it was concluded that... there was no mechanical fault, that drivers had simply been confused and hit the wrong pedal.  The United States government apologized to Audi, somewhat tardily.

Now, similar allegations are being directed at Toyota.  A Rhonda Smith from Sevierville, Tennessee recently testified (tearfully) to the U.S. Congress that her Toyota unaccountably accelerated out of control as she entered a freeway.  Rhonda must be a helluva good driver because, as the car accelerated to over 100 miles per hour, she not only guided it through the traffic, she also phoned her husband to tell him “goodbye,” and prayed.  She said this continued for six minutes (about 10 miles at 100 mph) and that the Lord’s intervention caused the car to stop!

An associate professor at the University of Southern Illinois, David Gilbert, testified that he could cause Toyotas to accelerate.  His method was to invade the cars’ electronics, cut and splice wires (in a manner that the car’s system itself could not do), and cause the car to accelerate.  Brian Ross on ABC News used a faked video to demonstrate Gilbert’s contention.  ABC didn’t disclose the fakery; they were exposed by Gawker.com.  Toyota engineers replicated Gilbert’s machinations on several other cars, including a Honda and a BMW.  They demonstrated that they could create exactly the same effect.

Unfortunately, with grandstanding congressmen conducting hearings, and deceitful media “reporting,” it’s harder to know the truth.  My bet is that this Toyota exposé will end somewhat like the Audi situation ended... driver error.

Disclaimer:  I was a Toyota dealer for almost twenty years (and have held franchises from most of the major car companies).  Toyota always manufactured the best cars and employed the best business practices.  I do not own any contemporary Toyotas, but obviously I admire the company.

 

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